As promised, the embryologist called to give us the status on the four remaining embryos we had. Unfortunately, none of the remaining embryos made it. The MCADD-positive one was only ever three cells big, and never divided past that size over a few days. That was not enough for the Stanford University project, and not viable for any other use. It was never meant to survive if that was all it could do over a six day period. The other three that they couldn’t get a reading on at the genetics lab began deteriorating on the last possible day of development. Again, these were never meant to survive, and fell apart all on their own.
I have mixed feelings about this. On one hand, I am so glad that there are no tough decisions about what to do with leftover embryos. On the other, I do feel a little vulnerable having only one shot at this. We were only able to create two viable embryos and they are now in me. If this round doesn’t take, or if we want more babies in the future, this doesn’t leave us with options. Either way, it is what it is, and we have to learn to take each day as it comes, and not waste energy worrying about what may or may not happen in the future.
I am still dealing with the after effects of hyper-stimulation (where the body goes overboard on the hormones and makes life pretty uncomfortable). Just the fact that we went through all of this to get two viable embryos makes it worth it. I have literally completely pushed my body to its limits to get these two boys. I may be uncomfortable, but it was necessary to get the result. They say it will take 2-3 weeks for this to work itself out. Because of how this feels, it is forcing me to lay around doing nothing a lot more than I would ordinarily do, which is probably best for the babies anyhow.
We are still just so completely excited. We have been happier than we have been in a long time thinking about the possible future with twin boys ahead of us. We have done as much as is humanly possible at this point, and it is up to God what happens next, so please pray for us! Think sticky thoughts for us and our boys! We would love to keep them both if at all possible!!