Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Side effects... Bleh...

Again I will say that they have me on an insanely high dose of hormones, and it is starting to work it's magic (if you want to call it that) on my system. Everything is looking right plumbing-wise with where they want me to be. But, I am super exhausted after I take my shot at night. It is hard too because they want you to do it at dinner time each night between 5-7pm, which I still have to be mom to a three year old for a few hours thereafter, who doesn't understand that mommy is tired and can't play right now. Guilt, guilt, guilt. I didn't realize how much he and I wrestle and play in the evenings. It is just a part of life raising a little boy, and I love it, but I can't do those things right now. I will have to be more creative about quieter play, and snuggling more than wrestling.

Then, there's a new wrinkle. The nausea. I was playing with Aaron this weekend at an indoor play gym, when all of a sudden it hit me: I am going to throw up. We are in a crowded and chaotic place. My kiddo is engrossed in what he is doing. What am I going to do?? Through some careful breathing and keeping calm, I kept it together. I managed to get Aaron out of there and into the car, and we went to my brother's house nearby so I could hand him off and take care of myself for a bit before making the drive home.

Then, last night, I came home from work feeling pretty terrible, and then finally got to the place that I really was throwing up. All evening. Ugh. And, when we called the IVF clinic to tell them about it, we still had to carry on and do another shot, same high dose. Just have to tough it out. It was a miserable night. Fortunately, the shot makes me tired, so as soon as it was in my system, I just went to bed. Today I am nauseous, but no throwing up. They are prescribing some anti-nausea medicine, which I am grateful for. It will have side effects of it's own, so I plan to hold off on taking it until it really is needed.

Remember these things?! (Stylish, aren't they?!) I used them when I had morning sickness with the boys. I didn't think I would need them again until I was pregnant with baby #3. My acupuncturist reminded me that I could do these as a non-drug option to help with the nausea. The white part is a bead that presses into pressure points that soothe nausea. It is helping, though it isn't completely healed. I will take it though. Lord, do I really have to do this for two more weeks?! I am a tough cookie though. I can handle a lot.

It is interesting, being my last go-around at having a baby. I am sad for many stages that will pass by, never to be experienced again. But then, there are things like this where I can tell myself with relief that this is the last time that I will have to do this. God willing, this will take, and I won't have to do IVF again. It is a crazy part of it, and it feels so great to be moving forward with having another baby, but IVF is not the most fun thing to do in the world. It is really rough on your body. Last time though. I can do this.

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